![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dru_evilista
Parts One, Two, Three, and Four and Five and Six and Seven
Title: Why you should never visit family if your last name is Chase
Author: Dru
Fandom: House M.D. X-over with Buffy/Angel
Pairing: Spoken of Angel/Cordelia other wise none
Summary: After a visit to his cousin Cordelia in LA Chase has a little problem....Ok make that a big problem!
Archive: If you want it!
Rating: M to be safe. Most likly not needed but I like to be safe!
Parts: 8/?
Status: WIP
Spoilers: for Buffy and Angel umm if you haven't seen them after all this time.....dude. House up until and after Deception. Set after House is back in charge.
Series/Sequel: No
Website: http://www.geocities.com/dru_evilpointybiteyone
Disclaimer: I do not own House M.D., any of the characters, or Buffy or or Angel or any of them either. *sulk*
Authors notes & Warnings: This is insane I know. *sighs* I've battled the plot bunnies for days but in the end as always I gave in and am writing this. It's a male preg. Yes I said it! Chase gets knocked up! Thank god for X-overs or this would be even stupider then it's going to be! To make this work (And make my self happy...) consider seasons 6 and 7 of Buffy to never have happened and seasons 4 and 5 of Angel to never have happened. *squints* Ok ok ok the Cordy/Connor/Jasmine crap and the Wolfram and Hart stuff never happened. Angel and co are still in the hotel all together working to help the hopeless and Cordy's still Cordy not....whatever you wanna call her during the total slaughtering of her character! Conner...umm *thinks of some way Conner could be non-annoying.* Eh screw it! Conner was never kidnapped! He's a toddler (*does quick math* About 4 now) Angel, Cordy and everyone have been raising since he was born. Cordy still did the half demon thing to keep her head from exploding and she and Angel are a happy couple of parents. Sunnydale is still there Buffy never came back and everyone's still all fighting by them selves, sometimes calling LA, etc... WARNINGS other then the Male pregnancy....I really, really, REALLY suck at writing medical babble! So um...forgive me? I'm googleing my fingers off but well... still not the best in the world! And I've never actually been pregnant my self so I'm going by research. lots and lots of research!
Now! On to the fic!
---
5 Weeks Later
Chase stood up and moved away from the conference table and started pacing the room.
House stepped though the glass door between the conference room and his office and watched Chase for a minute. "Braxton Hicks?"
Chase nodded sharply still walking.
"They're not- "
"No they're not regular or close together or too painful. I've been having them for weeks, and I'm a doctor. I know."
Wilson entered the room and froze watching the other two men. "Err everything ok in here?"
"Yeah just peachy. Our little mommy is just grumpy as usual." House said in amusement, walking around the pacing Chase to get to the coffee machine.
Wilson nodded, and smiled at Chase. "I bought you something to eat. Thought you might be hungry."
Chase wrinkled his node shaking his head. "Not really..."
"Chase you know you need to eat smaller meals throughout the day. It helps with the heartburn and the lack of appetite. And it's your favorite: chocolate, chocolate chip pancakes!" Wilson tempted.
Chase suddenly looked more interested. "Oh..alright I guess I could try to eat a little..."
Wilson grinned and set the container down on the table for Chase.
Wilson picked up and started reading the pile of papers sitting on the table as Chase starting eating. "What's this?"
Chase made a face. "My birth plan. House's idea. I keep saying I don't need a birth plan other then in a couple of weeks cut me open and yank him or her out, but he won't listen."
"Hey we never know. This is a magical pregnancy right? You could suddenly grow a vagina within the next few weeks and have a vaginal birth. Hell you're having Braxton Hicks contractions, who's the say you won't have real contractions? And even if you do need a c-section you still should have a plan for what you want and don't want with you and the baby." House said leaning against the counter looking like no matter how much logic he was using this really was all about annoying Chase.
Chase glared around his pancakes.
Wilson suppressed a laugh and read over the sheet. It was one of those lists with check boxes and options to help the 'mother' plan her labor and delivery and post partum. Chase had already started filling it out.
Birth Plan Worksheet
ATTENDANTS AND AMENITIES
I'd like the following people to be present during labor and/or birth:
Partner:
Friend/s: The damned people cutting him or her out of me.
Relative/s:
Doula:
Children:
I'd also like:
To bring music
To dim the lights
To wear my own clothes during labor and delivery
To take pictures and/or film during labor and delivery
LABOR
I'd like the option of returning home if I'm not in active labor. X
Once I'm admitted, I'd like:
My partner to be allowed to stay with me at all times
Only my practitioner, nurse, and guests present (i.e., no residents, medical students, or other hospital personnel) X
To wear my contact lenses, as long as I don't need a c-section
To eat if I wish to
To stay hydrated by drinking clear fluids instead of having an IV
To have a heparin or saline lock X
To walk and move around as I choose
As long as the baby and I are doing fine, I'd like:
To have intermittent rather than continuous electronic fetal monitoring
To be allowed to progress free of stringent time limits
If they're available, I'd like to try:
A birthing stool
A birthing chair
A squatting bar
A birthing pool/tub
I'd like to bring the following equipment with me:
Birthing stool
Beanbag chair
Birthing pool/tub
Other:
When it's time to push, I'd like to:
Do so instinctively
Be coached on when to push and for how long
I'd like to try the following positions for pushing (and birth):
Semi-reclining
Side-lying position
Squatting
Hands and knees
Whatever feels right at the time
As long as my baby and I are doing fine, I'd like the pushing stage to be allowed to progress free of stringent time limits
PAIN RELIEF
I'd like to try the following pain-management techniques:
Acupressure
Bath/shower
Breathing techniques/distraction
Hot/cold therapy
Self-hypnosis
Massage
Medication X
Please don't offer me pain medication. I'll request it if I need it.
If I decide I want medicinal pain relief, I'd prefer:
Regional analgesia (an epidural and/or spinal block) X
Systemic medication X
VAGINAL BIRTH
I'd like:
To view the birth using a mirror
To touch my baby's head as it crowns
The room to be as quiet as possible
To risk a tear rather than have an episiotomy
My partner to help "catch" our baby
After birth, I'd like:
To hold my baby right away, putting off any procedures that aren't urgent
To breastfeed as soon as possible
To wait until the umbilical cord stops pulsating before it's clamped and cut
My partner to cut the umbilical cord
Not to get routine oxytocin (Pitocin) after I deliver the placenta
C-SECTION
If I have a c-section, I'd like:
My partner present at all times during the operation
The screen lowered a bit so I can see my baby coming out
The baby given to my partner as soon as he's dried (as long as he's in good health)
To breastfeed my baby in the recovery room
POSTPARTUM
After delivery, I'd like:
All newborn procedures to take place in my presence X
My partner to stay with the baby at all times if I can't be there
To stay in a private room X
To have a cot provided for my partner
I plan to:
Breastfeed exclusively
Combine breastfeeding and formula-feeding
Formula-feed exclusively X
The following can be offered to my baby:
Formula X
Sugar water
Pacifier X
Please don't offer anything to my baby at any point
I'd like my baby fed:
On demand X
On a schedule
I'd like:
24-hour rooming-in with my baby X
My baby to room-in with me only when I'm awake
My baby brought to me for feedings only
To make my decision later depending on how I'm feeling
If my baby's a boy:
I'd like him circumcised at the hospital. X
I'll have him circumcised later.
I don't want him circumcised.
I'd like my other child(ren) brought in to see me and meet the new baby as soon as possible after the birth.
I'm interested in checking out of the hospital early. X
For your Final Birth Plan, provide the following identifying information:
IDENTIFYING INFORMATION
Name: Chase
Partner's name:
Today's date:
Doctor or midwife's name: House
Name of birth facility: PPTH
Wilson looked up at Chase. "He's really making you fill this out? House..."
House gave him a wide eye innocent look. "What? Hey he got this way by magic! Who's to say he won't really go though labor? Chase? Oh for..at least fill out the form even if you don't wind up using it!" House snapped after he took the sheet from Wilson's hand and quickly scanned over it seeing Chase had just skipped the labor and birth parts to the postpardum section.
"I'm not going to be in labor! I'm getting a c-section as soon as I hit 37 weeks and this child is safely at full term! In two weeks all this will be over with!"
"Hmmm gonna be kinda hard to get when your doctor says no, don'tcha think?"
"House!" Chase yelled trying to burn a hole though his head with his eyes.
"Chase!" House yelled back mockingly.
"House..." House sighed as Wilson give him The Look.
"Oh fine ruin all my fun..."
"Torturing the pregnant...man should not be fun." Wilson scolded.
"Hmpf. Says you..."
"Ah!"
House and Wilson's heads shot over as Chase gasped loudly and dropped his fork. "What's wrong?"
"The contractions... I- I think I'm in labor!" Chase gasped in horror.
---
Title: Why you should never visit family if your last name is Chase
Author: Dru
Fandom: House M.D. X-over with Buffy/Angel
Pairing: Spoken of Angel/Cordelia other wise none
Summary: After a visit to his cousin Cordelia in LA Chase has a little problem....Ok make that a big problem!
Archive: If you want it!
Rating: M to be safe. Most likly not needed but I like to be safe!
Parts: 8/?
Status: WIP
Spoilers: for Buffy and Angel umm if you haven't seen them after all this time.....dude. House up until and after Deception. Set after House is back in charge.
Series/Sequel: No
Website: http://www.geocities.com/dru_evilpointybiteyone
Disclaimer: I do not own House M.D., any of the characters, or Buffy or or Angel or any of them either. *sulk*
Authors notes & Warnings: This is insane I know. *sighs* I've battled the plot bunnies for days but in the end as always I gave in and am writing this. It's a male preg. Yes I said it! Chase gets knocked up! Thank god for X-overs or this would be even stupider then it's going to be! To make this work (And make my self happy...) consider seasons 6 and 7 of Buffy to never have happened and seasons 4 and 5 of Angel to never have happened. *squints* Ok ok ok the Cordy/Connor/Jasmine crap and the Wolfram and Hart stuff never happened. Angel and co are still in the hotel all together working to help the hopeless and Cordy's still Cordy not....whatever you wanna call her during the total slaughtering of her character! Conner...umm *thinks of some way Conner could be non-annoying.* Eh screw it! Conner was never kidnapped! He's a toddler (*does quick math* About 4 now) Angel, Cordy and everyone have been raising since he was born. Cordy still did the half demon thing to keep her head from exploding and she and Angel are a happy couple of parents. Sunnydale is still there Buffy never came back and everyone's still all fighting by them selves, sometimes calling LA, etc... WARNINGS other then the Male pregnancy....I really, really, REALLY suck at writing medical babble! So um...forgive me? I'm googleing my fingers off but well... still not the best in the world! And I've never actually been pregnant my self so I'm going by research. lots and lots of research!
Now! On to the fic!
---
5 Weeks Later
Chase stood up and moved away from the conference table and started pacing the room.
House stepped though the glass door between the conference room and his office and watched Chase for a minute. "Braxton Hicks?"
Chase nodded sharply still walking.
"They're not- "
"No they're not regular or close together or too painful. I've been having them for weeks, and I'm a doctor. I know."
Wilson entered the room and froze watching the other two men. "Err everything ok in here?"
"Yeah just peachy. Our little mommy is just grumpy as usual." House said in amusement, walking around the pacing Chase to get to the coffee machine.
Wilson nodded, and smiled at Chase. "I bought you something to eat. Thought you might be hungry."
Chase wrinkled his node shaking his head. "Not really..."
"Chase you know you need to eat smaller meals throughout the day. It helps with the heartburn and the lack of appetite. And it's your favorite: chocolate, chocolate chip pancakes!" Wilson tempted.
Chase suddenly looked more interested. "Oh..alright I guess I could try to eat a little..."
Wilson grinned and set the container down on the table for Chase.
Wilson picked up and started reading the pile of papers sitting on the table as Chase starting eating. "What's this?"
Chase made a face. "My birth plan. House's idea. I keep saying I don't need a birth plan other then in a couple of weeks cut me open and yank him or her out, but he won't listen."
"Hey we never know. This is a magical pregnancy right? You could suddenly grow a vagina within the next few weeks and have a vaginal birth. Hell you're having Braxton Hicks contractions, who's the say you won't have real contractions? And even if you do need a c-section you still should have a plan for what you want and don't want with you and the baby." House said leaning against the counter looking like no matter how much logic he was using this really was all about annoying Chase.
Chase glared around his pancakes.
Wilson suppressed a laugh and read over the sheet. It was one of those lists with check boxes and options to help the 'mother' plan her labor and delivery and post partum. Chase had already started filling it out.
Birth Plan Worksheet
ATTENDANTS AND AMENITIES
I'd like the following people to be present during labor and/or birth:
Partner:
Friend/s: The damned people cutting him or her out of me.
Relative/s:
Doula:
Children:
I'd also like:
To bring music
To dim the lights
To wear my own clothes during labor and delivery
To take pictures and/or film during labor and delivery
LABOR
I'd like the option of returning home if I'm not in active labor. X
Once I'm admitted, I'd like:
My partner to be allowed to stay with me at all times
Only my practitioner, nurse, and guests present (i.e., no residents, medical students, or other hospital personnel) X
To wear my contact lenses, as long as I don't need a c-section
To eat if I wish to
To stay hydrated by drinking clear fluids instead of having an IV
To have a heparin or saline lock X
To walk and move around as I choose
As long as the baby and I are doing fine, I'd like:
To have intermittent rather than continuous electronic fetal monitoring
To be allowed to progress free of stringent time limits
If they're available, I'd like to try:
A birthing stool
A birthing chair
A squatting bar
A birthing pool/tub
I'd like to bring the following equipment with me:
Birthing stool
Beanbag chair
Birthing pool/tub
Other:
When it's time to push, I'd like to:
Do so instinctively
Be coached on when to push and for how long
I'd like to try the following positions for pushing (and birth):
Semi-reclining
Side-lying position
Squatting
Hands and knees
Whatever feels right at the time
As long as my baby and I are doing fine, I'd like the pushing stage to be allowed to progress free of stringent time limits
PAIN RELIEF
I'd like to try the following pain-management techniques:
Acupressure
Bath/shower
Breathing techniques/distraction
Hot/cold therapy
Self-hypnosis
Massage
Medication X
Please don't offer me pain medication. I'll request it if I need it.
If I decide I want medicinal pain relief, I'd prefer:
Regional analgesia (an epidural and/or spinal block) X
Systemic medication X
VAGINAL BIRTH
I'd like:
To view the birth using a mirror
To touch my baby's head as it crowns
The room to be as quiet as possible
To risk a tear rather than have an episiotomy
My partner to help "catch" our baby
After birth, I'd like:
To hold my baby right away, putting off any procedures that aren't urgent
To breastfeed as soon as possible
To wait until the umbilical cord stops pulsating before it's clamped and cut
My partner to cut the umbilical cord
Not to get routine oxytocin (Pitocin) after I deliver the placenta
C-SECTION
If I have a c-section, I'd like:
My partner present at all times during the operation
The screen lowered a bit so I can see my baby coming out
The baby given to my partner as soon as he's dried (as long as he's in good health)
To breastfeed my baby in the recovery room
POSTPARTUM
After delivery, I'd like:
All newborn procedures to take place in my presence X
My partner to stay with the baby at all times if I can't be there
To stay in a private room X
To have a cot provided for my partner
I plan to:
Breastfeed exclusively
Combine breastfeeding and formula-feeding
Formula-feed exclusively X
The following can be offered to my baby:
Formula X
Sugar water
Pacifier X
Please don't offer anything to my baby at any point
I'd like my baby fed:
On demand X
On a schedule
I'd like:
24-hour rooming-in with my baby X
My baby to room-in with me only when I'm awake
My baby brought to me for feedings only
To make my decision later depending on how I'm feeling
If my baby's a boy:
I'd like him circumcised at the hospital. X
I'll have him circumcised later.
I don't want him circumcised.
I'd like my other child(ren) brought in to see me and meet the new baby as soon as possible after the birth.
I'm interested in checking out of the hospital early. X
For your Final Birth Plan, provide the following identifying information:
IDENTIFYING INFORMATION
Name: Chase
Partner's name:
Today's date:
Doctor or midwife's name: House
Name of birth facility: PPTH
Wilson looked up at Chase. "He's really making you fill this out? House..."
House gave him a wide eye innocent look. "What? Hey he got this way by magic! Who's to say he won't really go though labor? Chase? Oh for..at least fill out the form even if you don't wind up using it!" House snapped after he took the sheet from Wilson's hand and quickly scanned over it seeing Chase had just skipped the labor and birth parts to the postpardum section.
"I'm not going to be in labor! I'm getting a c-section as soon as I hit 37 weeks and this child is safely at full term! In two weeks all this will be over with!"
"Hmmm gonna be kinda hard to get when your doctor says no, don'tcha think?"
"House!" Chase yelled trying to burn a hole though his head with his eyes.
"Chase!" House yelled back mockingly.
"House..." House sighed as Wilson give him The Look.
"Oh fine ruin all my fun..."
"Torturing the pregnant...man should not be fun." Wilson scolded.
"Hmpf. Says you..."
"Ah!"
House and Wilson's heads shot over as Chase gasped loudly and dropped his fork. "What's wrong?"
"The contractions... I- I think I'm in labor!" Chase gasped in horror.
---
(no subject)
Date: Wednesday, August 16th, 2006 03:39 am (UTC)